You are at the point where you feel it’s right if I say yes to his relationship request. Before giving that response stop and check yourself with some deep self-questioning. Am I ready, does he have the qualities or principles I want my potential partner to possess? What do I have to offer him? what does he have to offer? Here are some few questions that you should answer without any emotional bias.
Yes, we are always faced with this constant assertion that not all relationships lead to marriage. In as much as it is a visible fact, you should not compromise or yield to that school of thought. However, the case may be, set standards that needs to be met. You should be able to see in him those attributes you would require your future partner to possess. However, there is no situation fits all, but before you change that Facebook status to “In a relationship”, here are five things to consider before starting that relationship.
Mental and Physical State
Relationship has gone past the phrases “Oh, he is cute”, “His smile is everything”, “and yeah his fart smells like lavender”. How well are you prepared mentally and physically? You should always have it at the back of your mind that relationship is not always a fairy tale. Mental state here refers to your ability to handle situations? Relationship can be messy in the beginning, so you must take your time to access yourself critically. Here, you would need to develop coping skills or mechanism, principles, do’s, and don’ts that would guide you in a way as not compromise your standard.
Do remember that our physical state is how well you take care of yourself, are you conscious about your looks, health, and overall well-being. If you are looking for a partner that is clean, takes good care of his health and personal hygiene, you are also expected to be one that do such.
We often equate compatibility with sharing common/same belief, ideology, or values. This is the biggest misconception that has trailed over the years. I wouldn’t dive near the over consumption of the Spanish- language series “Telemundo”, where everything about relationships looks near perfect by millennial.
The working definition of compatibility would be the blend of one or more differences molded into one. Here, we must understand that as individual, we have our personal principles, values, belief, and philosophy. So, before you consider starting a relationship ask yourself some deep questions. What are you values, principles, belief? Does it tally with the person you’re considering starting a relationship with? Can you compromise if they don’t? what are you willing to accept and that which is not acceptable?
Make sure you can answer this question with an open mind devoid of any emotional sentiments.
How Well Do You Know Him
Rushing into a relation with the pre-conceived notion that because he is from a religious home/family, he would hold attributes accruing to such a person. Ask him relevant questions and make sure you listen attentively not just to his words but body language. Questions like where he is from, his family, ambition/ career, principles, deal breakers, goals/ plan, likes and dislikes, and obviously his past relationships and how he handled them (if any). Don’t enter a relationship only because he is cute and presentable to your friends or family.